
I get asked the ‘where to go for what’ question a helluva lot. Regular text messages like: “Restaurant recommendation please, bud. First date, somewhere cosy. Oh, drinks after? Thanks.” Phone calls where I end up discussing the merits of how important atmosphere is versus food. Emails from people saying they’re going to Paris and want to know where to eat. It’s cool to help out, and people generally seem happy with my suggestions.
Anyways, these days, you don’t need a black book, you just need a smartphone and The Google Machine. But I thought it’d be fun to throw down four or five spots I recommend a lot and for what. I ended up throwing down a few more. So here they are, 40 rather useful places to know about. Yes, there’s a lot that would overlap and plenty more to add, but this is just how I first thought of them…
- First morning coffee: Deluxe Coffeeworks
- Coffee & croissant: Jason (ex-Jardine Bakery)
- Hangover breakfast: Sidewalk Cafe
- Classy breakfast: Table Thirteen
- Brunch: Bistro 1682
- Saturday morning beer: Neighbourgoods Market
- Healthy lunch: Cookshop
- Lunch and the paper: Mozzarella Bar
- Quick sandwich: Jason (ex-Jardine Bakery)
- Unfussy lunch with a mate: Mano’s
- Classy lunch with a mate: Dear Me
- Power lunch: Caveau
- Long boozy lunch: The Foodbarn
- Very low-key lunch: Dias Tavern
- Hipster lunch: Superette*
- Sunday lunch: Woodlands Eatery
- Winelands lunch: Bar Bar Black Sheep
- Early afternoon espresso: The Power & The Glory
- Drinks by the pool: Sandy B’s
- Early afternoon beer: &UNION
- Vegetarian meal: Masala Dosa
- Second best vegetarian: Lola’s
- After work drinks: &UNION
- Martini’s: Planet Bar
- Rooftop bar: The Grand Daddy
- Dinner with a mate: Hudsons
- Dinner with the family: Massimo’s
- Dinner with a view: The Roundhouse
- Romantic dinner: Kitima
- Tapas dinner: La Boheme
- Business dinner: Bizerca
- Gourmet experience dinner: Test Kitchen
- Low-key dinner: Nonna Lina
- Zen dinner: Kyoto Garden Sushi
- Tequila-fueled dinner: El Burro
- Classy nightcap: Fatback Soul
- Messy nightcap: Black Ram
- 4am on brandy: The Shack
- 4am on cocktails: Julep
- 5am toasted chicken mayo: Restaurant L’Orange aka Engen
Feel free to add your own suggestions as comments…
* okay, so there’s more to the Superette crowd than hipsters

I’m probably the last person to care about how a restaurant looks. I’d rather eat great Asian noodles bought from a dodgy cart on the side of the street than average noodles (which are street food anyway) served with ornately painted chopsticks in an expansive restaurant. That said, when you get great food in a beautiful space, it’s hard to beat. Emily Moon outside Plett is very close to one of those places. Sadly the food just falls short of the drool-worthy surroundings and annoyingly perfect African chic restaurant design.
This isn’t the case at Woodlands Eatery in Vredehoek, where the food is as delicious as the design is beautiful.

The chef turns out what could be called haute comfort cuisine, tasty favourites but done better than the norm. The menu changes but offers goods from their wood-fired pizza oven as well as items like the classic burger, grilled linefish and fishcakes. Except the fishcake might be made with fresh tuna, hence what I mean by ‘better than the norm.’ There’s also cocktails, Darling Brew on tap and the wine list is small but with the right choices, and reasonably priced. Oh, and a very cool cast concrete bar. The kind you can imagine drinking a lot at, though be warned: these are the highest bar stools in Cape Town, so don’t fall off.

Then there’s the design of the place. “Gorgeous,” and that’s said in the softest De Waterkant accent you can imagine with your pinky raised while you sip your Pimm’s. The new owners completely stripped the place (previously Yum Restaurant) and reinvented it. A mix of green and blue tones, concrete floors, unevenly hung lampshades, quirky art resides with 80′s restored retro furniture, or what looks like retro but I suspect was all made new from scratch. Even the soundtrack is pretty here. Expect the attractive young Cape Town interior design crowd to flock here in droves.

Overall, the restaurant is done in a style that makes you feel instantly comfortable, matches the unpretentious food and suggests you do more than just grab a bite here. Rather have lunch then laze the afternoon away on the couch outside.
I predict Sunday lunch tables to be booked out on a weekly basis pretty soon.
Oh, ironically, the owner/chef used to be the chef at Emily Moon. Seems he’s got it 100% right this time, a bonus for us Capetonians.
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Woodlands Eatery, Vredehoek (just above Deer Park). 021 801 5799.

I’m not really one for habit, generally avoiding it wherever possible. At school I used to sit at different desks just to, er, sit at different desks. I even cycled different routes home for the hell of it. To break the monotony. And if anything is monotonous, it’s school. When it comes to eating, monotony kills. The fun is when you try new things, discover new restaurants, play with recipes and drink new wines. But despite this, I realized I have a serious habit. I’ve found myself eating the salmon tartare on Tuesday’s at Caveau in Heritage Square. Not Tuesday’s on purpose, mind you, just by pure random chance. They do serve it any day from their raw bar, but pretty much every Tuesday for months now, either for lunch or dinner, I’ve had this tartare. And it might be the first habit I’ve picked up that I really enjoy. I’m going to stick to it.
Steak tartare is awesome, but using salmon makes a great alternative, and it’s healthier. Mixed with chopped chives, spring onions, capers, black sesame seeds and other good things, it’s bloody delicious. Served with a side of crispy straw chips and some thin toast to scoop up the salmon with, you’ll wolf it down in a few satisfying minutes. And you won’t feel horribly full or heavy, which is a bonus. Just be warned, a week will go by and you’ll start to crave it. Then you’ll be back there eating it. And if you want to really enjoy yourself, have a glass of refreshingly crisp Jordan Riesling with it. There are far worse ways to spend an afternoon.
Here’s to habits then, well, the good ones.
www.caveau.co.za

Superette is very much part of the ‘cool Cape Town’ scene. It’s partly the crowd, a mix of bohemian and hipster folk not short on style or scared to create their own. Plenty of cardigans, beards, stripey tops and enough Wayfarers for a Ray Ban advert. Plenty of pretty girls too (even the chef is pretty here). If you’ve got a style blog, come here for inspiration. It’s also definitely the effortlessly cool design of the place, complete with mismatched tables, bench seating and neutral colour scheme punctuated with canary yellow. It’s also location, location, location, in this case smack in the middle of shabby chic Woodstock, aka creative central. And finally, it’s the knowledge that Superette is owned by Cameron Munro and Justin Rhodes, the talented duo behind the Neighbourgoods Market at the Old Biscuit Mill and the What If The World gallery. Yes, more ‘cool Cape Town’ you’d be hard-pressed to find.
During the day, bright sunlight streams in through large windows that look out onto busy Albert Road and its noisy taxis. A small kitchen pants to keep up with orders, working hard to get you your gourmet sandwich, salad or soup. The menu is very rustic country; things like the All Day Breakfast sandwich and the Pork Belly with Caramalised Onions & Apple are favourites, the latter being one of the best sandwiches I’ve had in Cape Town. In fact, it’s one of the best sandwiches I’ve had, ever. When you’re finished it you just want to go home and get into bed, because you know the day won’t get any better. A solid looking machine pumps out good coffee, roasted by Deluxe, another very ‘cool Cape Town’ spot, and you can also get refreshment via some Brewers & Union beers out the help-yourself retro fridge in the corner. I can think of far worse places to come for breakfast or lunch.
They also do a supper club, usually twice a month. This has run around various themes: I missed the Lagosta lobster one (upsetting!) but made it to the vegetarian one and subsequently a night of Spag Bol after a recent art opening (the What If The World Gallery is upstairs). The spaghetti bolognese was superb, but being a raging carnivore the vegetarian night was a challenge. I survived the quinoa unscathed with much help from red wine and a bottle of grappa. It was pure chance/luck/misfortune/evil that Cameron happened to have that grappa on hand that night and decided to leave it on our table. Big mistake. Half an hour later we’d polished off most of it and I have vague memories of announcing my meat devotion to anyone that would listen and chasing the chef down the side alley as she made a rapid getaway in her car. Eish. Either way, it was a really fun night and luckily they’ve allowed me to return since.
If you’re heading out to Woodstock (antique furniture, anyone?) or the suburbs (why would you?) then Superette makes a great stopoff point for coffee or a bite. There supper club is an awesome vibe too and well worth keeping tabs on to see what’s next. This is rather easy to do through their blog, which is very cool and well-written itself. And yes, Superette oozes cool, but that’s what you get when people head overseas, soak up the best bits of food and culture and bring them back here. You also get one of the best neighbourhood cafés in Cape Town.
www.superette.co.za

Popped in here earlier this week. Always forget about it since it’s tucked away on a side road in Greenpoint, but have enjoyed every visit. Worth seeking out if you haven’t been. The vibe inside is a sort of casual opulence – think dark shades, white marble, mismatched chairs and chandeliers. The crowd is usually a mix of moneyed housewives and plenty of business folk, the latter making sense given the surrounding buildings. They serve some delicious warm lunch dishes that change daily and are written up in chalk on the wall, and a menu focused on breakfasts and sandwiches. They also have a table overloaded with freshly made pastries and cakes to tempt the sweet tooth.
But forget all this. You only need to know about one thing at Table Thirteen: the open breakfast sandwich of poached eggs, bacon, slow-roasted tomatoes and rocket. This little bit of egg & bacon love is undoubtedly one of the best breakfast sandwiches in Cape Town. Perfect for a Friday too. You’ll also pick up this useful bit of information on the wall to help you ease into the weekend…

Table Thirteen. Victoria Junction (entrance on Ebenezer Rd). 021 418 0739.

The nice folks at Eat In magazine hosted a bacon croissant competition this morning. And they asked me and a couple other foodies to help judge. Now for someone who’s idea of the perfect croissant is one with bacon in it, you can imagine the salivating that was going on from when I woke up this morning to when I made it to their offices on Bree Street. I basically needed a bib.
Sadly there were only three croissants to judge from, though I think our arteries pumped a sigh of relief. But you can’t really qualify the result as the ‘be all and end all of bacon croissant quality’ in Cape Town. And one of the three happened to not have bacon in it, a sad oversight in an otherwise good croissant. But, hey stick three croissants in front of me and I’m not going to complain. Especially when one of them is from Jardine Bakery, who tied on appearance (with the Taj) but cleaned up on the taste and texture categories and was the overwhelming winner. What a great start to the day, and hopefully Eat In will host a few more contests with more entrants in the future.
Note: Croissants have a varied origin, depending on who you believe. Apparently though, they have nothing to do with mysterious war victories or the crescent on the Turkish flag. The real origin appears to be an Austrian baker in Paris in the early 1800′s. Regardless of where the croissant originates, there is no doubt it is the most famous French pastry in the world. Can you name any pastry more famous? I can’t. And when they taste this good, who needs anything else.
Another note: several croissants died in the writing of this article.

Every neighbourhood needs a cozy Italian restaurant. It should serve large bowls of steaming pasta and crispy pizzas fresh from a wood-fired oven. It should have plenty of Italian regalia like Ferrari flags, Serie A posters and old framed photographs of soccer teams on its walls. Table clothes should be chequered and plenty of staff should appear to be Italian. There should be a Vespa parked out front. And it should be buzzing during major soccer games. But on all other nights it should also be busy too. The atmosphere should always be completely unpretentious. In shorts & slops or collar & tie, you should feel at home and at ease.
This is Bacini’s. You won’t find the best pasta in Cape Town here, or the thinnest pizza crust. You won’t find a great wine list or unbelievable service. But you will find a reliably comforting spot to grab a bite and enjoy a decent bottle of red. Or you can pop in for takeout pizza and enjoy a draft Peroni at the bar. Grab a seat on the outside terrace if you can and enjoy the sunset. The staff are friendly and the vibe relaxed. Like I say, it’s not the best Italian restaurant in Cape Town, but it’s easy. And sometimes that’s all you want.
Bacini’s. 177 Kloof Street. 021 423 6668.
ClemenGolds.

Yes, these little mandarin buggers are tasty. Yes, they are also good for you. They’re easy to peel. They have no seeds. And they’re available at most Woolworths stores. They’re expensive when compared with a big bag of oranges on the side of a country road, but hell, they’re awesome, man! Disclaimer: no, I’m not sponsored by citrus farmers, I just like these things.
La Muerte.

A locally made ‘tequila’ that has the coolest fucking bottle you will ever see. It’s only appropriate to use foul language when describing this crazy shit, because it’s so good you will naturally end up drinking too much, forgetting that it still has an arsewarmingly fair deal of alcohol and probably do something stupid. But then, that’s tequila. Love her or hate her, she’s a hard bitch and will always be around. Oh, she’s also 100% fucking organic. (www.agavemuerte.com)
Bunny Chow.

It’s winter, and though it might feel like summer in Cape Town, as it always does in Durban and probably is in Joburg, now is a great time to get your chili on. Forget the rice though, and rather make bunny chow. Just make a curry and splash it into a breadroll, then garnish with some fresh chili and coriander. Done. Anyone can make curry – if you have a stove, pot, knife and a wooden spoon you can do it, no excuse. Skip the plates and use wax paper to hold the rolls. Less mess to clean up.
AA Gill.

You know this man. The original restaurant assassin. Don’t really need to say anything, really. What a legend though. Read his stuff. Checkout AA Gill is Away, an excellent read.
Kalk Bay.

If you’ve ever experienced a Sunday then you’ve experienced a Sunday where you want to get outdoors, go somewhere near the water, and enjoy fish ‘n chips. Kalk Bay is on every real Capetonian’s to-do list on most weekends, it’s just that we only get to it once a month. If we’re lucky. Walk down the road in the sun, scour antique shops and browse old books. Or skip that and go straight to the good stuff: breakfast at Olympia Bakery, fish ‘n chips to go from Lucky Fish or a long lazy lunch at Live Bait. You can also do all of this in one Sunday if you’re worried you’re not going to get back soon. Note: Kalk Bay is also open on other days of the week, though you wouldn’t think this based on how busy it is on Sundays.
Reyneke Wines.

Biodynamic doesn’t mean much to many but it means everything to some. Johan Reyneke is one of the few it means everything to. He’s crafted his entire winery around farming biodynamically: essentially in a way that views the entire farm as a living organism. Actually he’s crafted his entire life around this concept, and it has worked well for him and his wines. Each of his wines is special, tastes unlike any other wine and is deserved of praise entirely on this merit. Yet they’re deserved of far more praise when you consider how he farms, in a way that ensures the land will be productive for centuries. www.reynekewines.co.za

I can’t truly describe just how good this rum is. First, to understand what we’re dealing with here, you need to understand that not all rums are equal. Most rums you’ve heard of are mass-produced mixers, designed to be the alcohol in cocktails. Not this stuff. Sailor Jerry is inspired from the days when sailors picked up cheap rum infused with various spices and drank it neat. Which is exactly how you should drink Sailor Jerry. Except it is not cheap and nasty. It is smooth, smokey and velvety. In fact, it borders on a creamy texture in the mouth. A rum with such a ridiculously rich and round quality deserves to be sipped out of a tumbler with no rocks, no mixer and no bullshit. Maybe a cigar in the other hand. Like the Partagás I happened to enjoy with my two glasses of Sailor Jerry in the Heritage Square courtyard last week.

The second thing you need to understand about Sailor Jerry, is who Sailor Jerry was. His name was Normal Collins and after a stint in the Navy he settled in Hawaii and became the most famous tattoo artist in the world. He just happened to set up shop before two world wars sent millions of sailors through the area, all more than happy to get tattoos. Sailor Jerry was the original tattoo celeb, way before Miami Ink and so on. His distinctive style is instantly recognizable and you’ll know it. Sadly, probably not as tattoos. One of his protege’s sold the rights to a famous designer who has offended us with his misuse of them on clothing ever since. That protege was Ed Hardy.
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Sailor Jerry rum is best enjoyed in the Heritage Square courtyard, ordered via HQ Restaurant & Bar.

Croque Monsieur. There it is. Done. Finish. Klaar. Resistance is futile. Whatever you might say, you know you really want to eat this today. Mmm, melted Gruyere cheese and ham, toasted in the oven. With a quick espresso. Lunch, done.

Good, wasn’t it? Now get back to work.